Thursday, June 6, 2013

Frankly, My Dear, I Don't Give A. . .

Most of you know the rest of this line from "Gone With The Wind."  It was the line that changed movies forever because Rhett Butler says a curse word on the big screen.  (Look how far we've come.) 

This is how I felt today.  Andy and I had a smallish (okay, not so smallish) "discussion" over a few things today (matters of the heart coming out with tears, snot, and not very nice words).  Then, several hours later, I came home to a perfectly manicured lawn.  I really could not care less what my lawn looks like.  I couldn't. . . ever.

I learned long ago that when Andy makes our lawn look nice, he is trying to tell me that he loves me.  That is where the Rhett Butler quote comes in.  So, I texted him that the lawn looked nice (trying to be nice about it because I knew his heart behind the jesture) and he texted back that he wanted it to be nice for me.  Que Rhett.

Love is so funny.  I am still in the figuring out process (after 20 years of knowing this man) and I'm sure I'll still be in the figuring out process for the next 20+20+20 or so years, but here is one thing I have learned.  Andy mowing the lawn for me is his version of snuggling.  He gives love by making the lawn (and therefore my house he says) look nice.  I receive love by quality time and physical touch.  They don't match.  (God does have a sense of humor.)  But I have learned over the years that I have to learn to receive Andy's love in the way that he gives it to me.  (This doesn't mean that he shouldn't try to give me love in the way I would like to receive it, but that's his deal.)  And like-wise, I give love by snuggling and he receives it with words of encouragement, so que the wonderful and encouraging words from me. . .like "the lawn looks great!  Thanks, honey!"

So, my lawn is nice and even though I frankly don't give a you-know-what, I am choosing to feel loved today.  (Some days--today--it is harder to pull off, but its a choice I have to make:  Somebody Loves Me!  Where's my red pin with white letters when I need it?)

1 comment:

Misty said...

Have you read "The Five Love Languages" yet? If not you would love it...if so, you probably loved it.