Friday, March 29, 2013

Good Friday

I've always felt so weird calling today "Good Friday."  I know why it's good.  I realize that without God's Son dying for me on the cross (and raising again on Sunday) that I wouldn't be righteous enough to make it into heaven.  I know that is why we call it Good Friday.  We learned on that day what true love meant.  It was good.  But God had to turn His back on His only Son as Jesus suffered unimaginable pain and ultimately death.  That doesn't seem "good."

Anyway, thinking about this led me to think about two dear families who have been on my heart for the past couple of days. . . .

One of my dear friends gave birth to a beautiful baby boy late Monday night.  However, before he was born, her uterus ruptured and he was without oxygen for at least an hour.  Since then he has been on a cooling pad and a feeding tube and a ventilator.  His heart wasn't beating when he was born and he has quit breathing several times since. . . .

Yesterday we found out that the sister of a guy we love like family is pregnant, but her baby girl (who is due in five months) has no skull.  So, if she makes it full term, she may not survive the delivery and if she survives the delivery, she won't live very long after that. . . .

My heart has been breaking for these two families.  I've been praying for miracles and peace and understanding and deep love.  I've been thinking about these families all week. . . I've prayed like never before. . . .

When Hays's friend, Chase, died this fall, his mom said that she had been praying for miracles for so long and she realized that maybe the miracle was that she got to spend an extra six years with Chase after the terrible diagnosis.  That's perspective.

In the first family's case, the fact that the mom didn't die when her uterus ruptured or in surgery is such a miracle.  The fact that their little boy is alive today (even with help) is a miracle.  The dad got to change his diaper and hold his hand.  Each hour is a miracle for them and they seem to be so peacefully seeing it as such.

For the second family, they know (to a certain extent) what lies ahead and it is the death of their daughter.  But they are choosing (even in the intense pain) to celebrate her little life.  They are going to cherish every moment including the kicks that mom will get to feel for the next five months.  If she survives the birth, they will count each second as a blessing to be spent with their daughter.

My heart is absolutely breaking for these families, but in one sense, they are lucky. . .they know that each moment needs to be cherished.

I know that.  I know that we aren't promised another hour on this earth, but I often live taking each hour for granted and taking my kids for granted and my husband for granted and everything.  I live tired and overwhelmed and looking for tomorrow instead of making each moment the best it can.  And that is going to stop!  I've been so inspired by these families and I felt the tug on my heart early last week when Andy got run over to live life like each day is a gift, but this week has reinforced that.

So, back to Good Friday.  In the horrible pain and darkness, it was Good.  The story didn't end on the cross and therefore it was Good.  Therefore it IS good.

I'm not sure if any of that had to do with anything, but welcome to my crazy train of thought.

Live today.  Love today.  Enjoy today.  Today is Good!

1 comment:

Bronwyn Rapp said...

Jamie,
I just read this blog post. Makes me teary the way you have cared for us and prayed for us this week. Your words are perfect. I feel like God has replaced worry with peace and I often wake up just feeling thankful. Praising God for who He is and what He has done for Holden. But I like your perspective on each moment as a miracle. I always want to remember and be amazed at small moments. I love you Jamie. Thankful I know you!